Going for a walk. I canโt do this anymore. I canโt take any more damage. Everyone in real life just sees me as an online whore and I canโt handle any more conversations that wake me up from being the person I want to be every day. Iโm a human.
Streaming in Australia and then coming back to try and figure out how to get promo for myself. I just canโt handle any more private conversations. I donโt know how to explain the frozen feeling in my brain. I just canโt do the parts that take me looking outside of myself. Sorry again for all the nudes Iโve accidentally sent out or posted publicly without meaning to. I havenโt been okay after everything. Im still packing for Orlando. I canโt be around my family anymore. I function worse than not doing anything when I donโt have a good support system or people who really see or care about me. I deserve to be seen as I am and cared about. Yea. ๐
Looking for someone to come over and help me with the room of doom. Chad is gone and Iโm kind of tired of begging him to help me. Iโve already had my first cry for today. I donโt want to cry anymore or beg anyone to help me. He left again after I started breaking down again from asking him to help me. Iโve already given him all the money I could and he still wonโt help me with what I need. I donโt know what to do. He said heโs never coming back again and Iโm exhausted from waiting for him to step up. I need help. I need to be taken care of. And I donโt want anyone introducing any more money making opportunities to me that arenโt good for me. Iโm tired and I got 17 dollars I need to make to feel better. Please. Just post me on pornhub or YouTube with a mention so I can stop having a heart attack. I used to get 15k views a year and now I only get 200. I wish I didnโt let some of the people I met this year come close to me. Iโm so tired of being a pit stop for people who donโt care about me at all. Fuck off. I donโt have anything. Just people who donโt see me. ๐คฃ
I wrote this poem yesterday! I really liked it and enjoy reading it. ๐ถโ๐ฝthink I want my book to be called Edgar Allen hoes and then itโll be a fun collection of poetry by homies who feel like sharing their art. ๐๐ถโจโญ๏ธโฅ๏ธ
I enjoyed my friends graduation! ๐บ๐ธ She mastered deeznuts is what she did. So smart. So proud of her. ๐๐ฅฐ Education has been the problem and solution this entire time. We need more easy access education. ๐ ๐ฆ๐ฆ
Congratulations to all my super hot girlfriends with their college degrees and masters degrees! โค๏ธGo FIU. ๐โญ๏ธโญ๏ธโญ๏ธโญ๏ธโญ๏ธ Coeds are so smart and hot. ๐๐ฅฐ
Busy at home doing nothing. ๐ฏ๐๐ปโโ๏ธ
๐ป๐ปโโ๏ธ๐ผโค๏ธ๐ก๐ด๐ค๐ฅฑ
โญ๏ธโญ๏ธโญ๏ธโญ๏ธโญ๏ธ๐ช๐พ๐จโ๐๐จโ๐๐จโ๐๐บ๐ธ๐พ๐พ๐พ๐
I love seeing people express themselves.
Good or bad. I think itโs pretty important. Even if theyโre โlosing itโ or saying things they donโt mean or seem crazy/nuts. It doesnโt have to be โgood vibes onlyโ for everyone and i love when people arenโt afraid to let it out or process it. We all say things we donโt mean because we are genuinely feeling tidal waves inside of us by ourselves. For me, ptsd and whatever experiences I had turn me into someone Iโm not sometimes. Sometimes, I say things I donโt mean or react in scary ways because I feel pushed into a corner. As I am in this world, I feel like I get pushed into situations or perspectives I kinda never asked for that werenโt good for me in any way. This is where I feel I kind of have to bare my teeth to feel like I have more power or control over my life. Iโm sorry to everyone Iโve hurt while Iโve been frustrated, depressed, scared, weak and confused. Thank you for your patience and generosity with me as well. I know Iโm not always easy to take in. My friends are so strong. Thank you. Iโm doing my best and Iโm really inspired by some of my sisters across space like @maicocoa. She recently shared her struggles and sorries and that made it easier for me to try and come back as a normal human being. Im so glad to have sisters from other sisters. โญ๏ธ๐ธ๐ป๐ธ๐ฟThe Mai Space Twins. ๐ซ(identical)
Iโm thankful to have all sorts of inspiration and resources of good to shape me into the better person I know I can be and want to be. Even if I didnโt have the same set of spoons as other people, I can still sit at the same table and deserve to, along with all of my beautiful and strong sisters. I want to be stronger and I will be. I believe in me and all of my friends. None of my friends are weak. โญ๏ธ๐ซโญ๏ธ๐ธ๐ป๐๐ธ๐ผ๐โญ๏ธ๐ธ๐ฝ๐๐ซ๐ธ๐ฟ๐Some of us have more to carry. I know this sounds random but I canโt rly be mad at women, Pent up emotions arenโt really good for anyone. Seeing how the world is for some people, I think itโs understandable and I never pay it any mind when horrible things are said when upset. I love all of you. ๐๐
What is your holiday theme this year? ๐๐บ๐ธ๐๐คถ๐ป๐๐๐
Iโm having a questionable Christmas??? ๐๐๐พ๐ฅก๐ง๐ฐ๐ฃ๐ค๐ค๐ค๐ฅญ๐ฅฅCuz its awkward with everything going on right now but I still want to be holiday happy festive. I think everyone does, too. Maybe. I canโt speak for everyone. ๐ถ๐
Gang Gang says he wants to be the photographer. ๐ถ๐พChad is taking care of me rn and playing video games on his laptop as I clean. Iโm so happy to have some company. ๐
A white pearl Christmas!
A red Shiny Christmas
And a just happy to be here Christmas, I donโt really know how to celebrate this holiday. Iโm having a family photo with Chad, snowball and gang gang and weโre looking for ways to celebrate without adding tons of stuff. The dragonโs hoard is in the Room of doom. Chad says we can get through it together! ๐๐๐ณ๐ฌ๐จ๐บ๐ฆ๐ด๐๐๐งง
I ainโt got time for games.
I only got time for games.
Bpdeez nuts
Adhdeez nuts
Phdeez nuts
India Anna jones
India hannah Jones
lil merika
Lil China
๐คซ๐๐ปโโ๏ธ๐ธ
Still addickted to the phone. Wrote some crazy stuff to clear it out from my mind. Setting the hourglass for a POWER hour of cleaning and meditating. Brb. Youโre gonna make lots of monies today. ๐ฅฐ๐
I get overstimulated easily and then I have to run away. I prefer not talking. I love giving massages and being nice. I still need to make friends. I like to hang out happily like a silent bob. Ask 7 of your most favorite idols if theyโd like an hour massage from me! ๐
50 percent done. Thank you again to everyone being there for me as I try to ground myself. I saw a text in real life checking in on me and I wanted to check in and let everyone know km not alone. Chad is watching over me and taking care of me with anime. Heโs going to teach Marie condo how to organize clothes and clean. Looking forward to it, cuz Iโve been a bit of a storm and/or hurricane. ๐ Iโm lucky to have love and guidance of good people around via irl, internet and onlyfans. Thanks for letting me exist here. ๐๐๐๐ผ๐๐๐ป๐คท๐ปโโ๏ธ๐ฆ๐ช
Gonna have to call on godโs retrievers for this one.
Before pictures of one of the rooms of doom.
Turning off phone and hibernating for a bit with Chad and pretending Iโm a cat. Then focusing on clearing the room of doom again. I can do it. I deserve a safe and comfy space to be in. ๐โญ๏ธ๐๐Iโm not turning my phone on again until the room is cleared.
See you soon, cutie. I love you!๐๐โญ๏ธ๐ช
I twisted chadโs nips and spanked him for choosing this morbid ass anime called Demon Slayer. ๐ I know he knoes how crazy we both know I am. So I looked him in his eyes and twisted his both of his nips. He KNOWS I can only handle Hamtaro right now. ๐ I threw my lemon pillow at him and my snowflake blanket.
โ๏ธ๐
โฆI told him he could watch whatever he wanted if he came over tho so im gonna keep working out under his soft guidance and clean room. Iโm lucky to have someone who can put up with me and keep up, too. ๐ ๐๐ผ๐โ๏ธ
Weโre getting rid of everything and disappearing. ๐ป I finally told my father off for how he treated my mother and for not giving us holidays. I donโt think I can celebrate anything around my family. As much as I try, o canโt make my family see me as a person or talk to me like Iโm a human being. Nothing works. ๐คท๐ปโโ๏ธ Weโre gonna watch more tv and Iโm going to decide my own family with healthy things and traditions. Like Disney world and stuff. I want a family. ๐ ๐๐ผ
Like dis
Please use rainbow comic sans! Thatโs like my favorite thing and I think itโs really funny. ๐๐๐๐๐. Show me that you made an account and Iโll send you things! If you know another language or are gay or gayish or a single parent, a veteran or currently serving military man, you will have priority.
Donโt even think about asking for racial play in my dms, I will destroy you. Nobody wants that shit. NOBODY GROWS UP THINKING THEY NEED OR WANT RACIAL ABUSE. FUCK OFF. ๐คฃAnd I donโt need you going around thinking itโs acceptable/normal or trying to convince my sisters itโs normal when sheโs naive and desperate for attention. Itโs not. Go get some fuckkng self esteem thats not based on degrading and humiliating me or my sisters. Merry Christmas, you ugly assholes. I love you if youโre not a psycho hurting people for no reason!!! ๐ฅฐ we need more of you good people in existence. Im lonely! Lol. ๐๐๐๐๐ด๐๐ผ
I donโt remember writing some of these. ๐
If I was outside looking in, I would consider me nuts and scary. It is what it is. What can ya do under the circumstances? ๐คท๐ปโโ๏ธ๐คท๐ปโโ๏ธ๐คท๐ปโโ๏ธ๐ฅณโ๏ธ๐ถโจ
Glad Iโm in America is all I can say for now. Looking forward to seeing Australia, Asia, South America, North America and Antarctica.
๐ We are greater than our ancestors. ๐
๐ We will be the ones to free our people. ๐
WORLD WAR FREE
WORLD WAR FUN
LARRY FLYNT STONERS
MAXIM.UM REPARATIONS
ASSGUARDIANS
SPECIAL ORGY FORCES
THE SUPER LOUD PROFESSIONALS
COMEDY CENTRAL IDIOT AGENCY
ADULTISH SWIM
GOONAMI
Chad got a 100 on his test and I told him how proud I am of him. I was thinking about how I was raised and I would love positive encouragement. I am really happy he did so well in school. Education is the answer to everything. Releasing new content tonight. He finished his paper for grad school and is coming over after laundry. Iโm looking forward to human interaction and he said maybe we could make content in the future. We had some conversations recently that made me a little more understanding of whatโs going on. Iโm glad heโs human.
Yes, it has to be the old, original hardcore and extreme bondage video that was r๐venge porn. ๐ด We all know no one is on pornhub typing in โWHOLESOME YUNG ASIAN GIRL FROLICKING THROUGH A PRAIRE OF SUNFLOWERS WITH ALL HER CLOTHES ON AND A HUGE SMILE ON HER INNOCENT, HAPPY FACE.โ in the search engine. Unfortunately. Yet. ๐ป๐ป๐ป
Some of my favorite movies!
Share your top 7 movies with me. โบ๏ธโญ๏ธโญ๏ธโญ๏ธโญ๏ธโญ๏ธ๐๐ฅฐ๐๐๐
1. Walk Hard, the Dewey Cox story
2. Rush Hour 1
3. Rush Hour 2
4. Shrek 1
5. Shrek 2
6. Legally Blonde 1
7. Legally Blonde 2
8. Sleeping Beauty
Oh, Iโm not Jewish. Iโve just noticed itโs a large group of people that have been persecuted since the beginning of time. Even if they were responsible for a lot of damage, Iโve met a lot of really lovely Jewish people and I canโt imagine anyone wanting bad on them. I saw some weird documentaries about the Middle East on Netflix and itโs been bothering me that thereโs religions encouraging harm on Jewish people. Thatโs likeโฆ something no one should have to worry about??? Idk. Lol. I wouldnโt want anything to happen to them and I want to make sure I contribute to a world that lets them know theyโre important. The world isnโt really set up well for them right now and I want more voices and power for the people of Israel. I think Jewish people have gone through enough. Sometimes, I feel bad about celebrating christmas if it makes my Jewish homies feel alienated. Then I remember I think most people just want a month to be festive and I hope they know itโs not a religious thing for me. Merry Xmas and happy holidays! Free Israel and happy Hanukkah. โบ๏ธ๐๐๐ฏ
Anyone running any accounts under me are allowed to protest or post whatever articles and art/content. Freedom of peach. ๐๐๐